This is an easy daily prompt for me today as I wrote this in December. I am not even sure when I started doing the daily prompts, which could be why I did not have a link to it.

I just heard three vocalists sing “Silent Night, Holy Night”.  Each had their own unique style.  What struck me was when they all blended their voices together at the end singing in different ranges, yet harmonizing as one that I recalled the days when I was in a choir and another time when I took voice lessons.

In choir, we were taught the importance of not having one voice overpower the rest of the choir or group we were a part of.  If one voice dominates the group then the other parts are not heard and the choir is no longer a choir, but a soloist with a backup choir.

I took voice lessons, because I wanted to sing on the stage at my church which is a big church.  What I did not realize is how much time, energy, discipline, and natural talent is required to be a singer on the stage there.  Not only that it requires a willingness to be seen and a vulnerability to be open to criticism or feedback in order to improve your vocal ability.  I learned a lot during this time about how to improve my vocal ability, but without the pure natural talent, it created within me a feeling of knowing that it was not the ideal fit for me.  I did not have the self-discipline to fully invest myself into it.  I did not sense that this is what God was calling me to do, all I knew is that I wanted it and was going to get my way, whether God wanted it for me or not.

It was only when I was wrestling with God about it, that I finally reluctantly relinquished my desire to be a singer to pursue what I think was his calling on my life.  How do I know it’s his calling?  First off, it is a natural skill I have and was built upon and improved through therapy and education.  Secondly, many people have validated my skills and abilities about it.  Third, I myself have seen how I have been very good at helping others work through their issues.  When I feel I am being used by God in the way he wants me to then I know I am in that sweet spot that Max Lucado refers to in his book, “Cure for the Common Life:  Living in  Your Sweet Spot” by Max Lucado.

Now that I have graduated with a Masters in Social Work, my next step of faith is to find a job that can bring me to my goal.  My musical experiences will help me in the overall picture of pursuing God’s calling on my life.  There will be times that I will be a part of a professional team and there are other times where I will need to go solo.  It will require a step of faith trusting that God has His best intentions for me.

No one can sit by me and hold my hand to help me not to feel afraid.  I now have the tools I have learned in therapy and my education to both help me and others.  There is no guarantee that the next step will be my final goal.  It most likely won’t.  All I know for certain is I am not 100% satisfied with doing life the way I have been doing it.

As I step out in faith with boldness and courage I can take one step at a time.  Eventually, I will find a job and will experience satisfaction and feel God’s pleasure for me as I pursue his calling on my life.  Then I will hear the voices of those around me blending into one voice creating a harmony unlike any other I have experienced in my life.

©Kimberly Balles 2016 All Rights Reserved.


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